Baby showers can be a lot of fun, but they can also be a lot of work. Many expecting families have a friend or family member throw them a baby shower and all they have to do is show up and open gifts. Not all of us are that fortunate though, and sometimes the responsibility of throwing the shower falls on the very people the shower is for. Well between pregnancy sickness, third trimester fatigue, and continuing to work through our pregnancy, taking on the additional task of throwing a baby shower can feel like a lot of work. So I put together this quick, direct, no-nonsense guide to help you throw the perfect baby shower without wearing yourself out or breaking the bank.
The Wish List
You might not think the wish list is a great place to start, but you will want to have the location of the list printed on your invite, so you want to start early on this. Also, it is so much fun to build your wish list! Seriously, it is one of my favorite parts of pregnancy because it can really get you thinking about the baby’s nursery, your needs, your relationship, and what kind of parent you want to be.
You want to be sure to include a wide range of items and costs to go with them. It’s always acceptable to put the expensive items on the list (think car seats and pack n plays) but you will want an array of less expensive items as well such as books, toys, bottles, and other practical materials. This way everyone can feel like they can participate.
Need some ideas on where to get started? Check out some of my useful buying guide blogs:
Now where does this list live? I have two suggestions for you, depending on your community and the array of gifts you want.
A much less well known, but registry option I learned about when a friend had their baby was the baby registry from Babylist. Now this is great for people who don’t necessarily want a ton of stuff, or at least not a lot of really inexpensive things. This registry gives you the option to add services or moments to the registry, such as babysitting or cooking meals. You can also select big ticket items, like a baby moon or a down payment on a house that your friends and family can donate to. It’s a great way to call on your community to really donate towards the items or services that make sense for you. This one is especially great if you are throwing a Sprinkle and not a shower since you may have a lot of the material items already but could really use some housecleaning support. I found it to be a great alternative to Amazon with a much wider range for creativity and room for support around services.
Date and Location
Next you have to decide on when and where to have this event. For when, I always highly encourage a Saturday mid-day on a non-holiday weekend. You will never be able to coordinate so that everyone on your guest list can attend, but Saturday mornings are often the most open. Make sure you have a start and an end time though, otherwise you may find your shower lasting 8 hours! So think Saturday, 10-2 or so. And make sure people feel they can come and go if appropriate, so there isn’t any pressure for them to stay the whole time.
Now believe it or not, when in your pregnancy can really matter. I advise around 30-34 weeks in your pregnancy. It is late enough that you are well and safely out of the first trimester (in case you were keeping that information confidential until after that point), while also offering your guests and yourself plenty of time to plan. It’s also not so late in your pregnancy that you are uncomfortable, exhausted all the time, or at risk of going into labor during your party. Plus, around this time you are starting to show more, so everyone can see you sporting your adorable baby bump at your shower.
As for location, this one is widely up to you. I’m cheap, so I always prefer to have these types of events in my own home. If you have access to something like a club house or it’s a nice time of year and you can go to a park or something, go for it. There isn’t a right or wrong answer around this one. A significant perk for having the event in my own house though was that I didn’t have to load up gifts at the end of the party. They were already in my house and I was able to just move them to the appropriate room. Downside of hosting is the cleaning of your house before and after the baby shower.
The Invites
Now that you have nailed down some of the more important details around when, where, and what, you can officially start making invites. In this day of electronics, Evites have become very popular and widely successful. If you have a more tech savvy group of friends, this is often the way to go. Although to be clear, Evites are not complicated in the least, so you really don’t have to be that good with technology. This method can be difficult if you don’t have email addresses of your friends (seriously though, you can just ask…), or if you have a lot of older family such as grandparents who are not as reliant or willing to use the internet as our generation is. Still, it can be an efficient and free way of sending out invites. Additionally, Evite leaves room for you and your guests to leave comments, they can update their attendance status easily, and you can get a quick snapshot of how many people will be coming.
Likely even more common than the Evite is a simple Facebook event. I hesitate around this one because Facebook falls in and out of popularity, but I don’t see it going away completely any time soon, so it seems safe overall. Similar to evite, you can get a quick snapshot of how many and who will attend, there is room to leave comments, and individuals can easily change their attendance status if need be. I have a lot more Facebook contacts than I do email, so that helps with contacting more people. And with both electronic options, you can put the link to your wish list somewhere easy for guests to find.
Finally, there is the good old paper option. Now this option is going to be the most expensive, both in time and materials. Where Facebook and Evite are free, the cost of envelopes, stamps, and the time to mail out invitations is certainly not. Do not doubt the usefulness of this method though. Good old fashioned snail mail is a great way to get in contact with a lot of individuals. Plus, I know my Grammie (so Monster’s Great Grandma) likes to keep invitations for important events in her scrapbook. So paper invitations certainly have their place. I just wouldn’t advise you to use them as your only option.
Your invitations should contain the date, time, and location of your baby shower. They should also have a link or way for your guests to access your wish list. There is also a tradition where every guest brings a bag of diapers as well as a gift. If this tradition doesn’t meet your need, either because you have diapers, you plan to use cloth, or it simply isn’t functional for you, I highly encourage you to check out my blog about starting your baby’s first library through their shower.
The Food
Almost every baby shower is going to have some food, regardless of what time it is. In the advised 10-2 slot, you will be offering lunch. I highly suggest a rapid, open, serve yourself sort of approach. My hands down favorite is the taco bar. Heat up some meat in a crock pot and let it hang out in there to keep warm. Then set out some tortillas, an array of toppings such as cheese, sour cream, salsa, guacamole, tomatoes, and anything else you can think of, and call it good. Offer a few beverage varieties, from simple water to soda to juice. Taco bars tend to be easy to make and even easier to clean up. Plus, there is the added bonus of scalability, where it’s pretty straightforward to make more or less depending on how many people you will have attending.
Also, dessert. I’m sure your very pregnant self (or partner) doesn’t need a reminder to do dessert, but just in case. Make sure you whip up a delicious closing to your meal. I always suggest brownies, cake, or cookies. Yum!
The Decorations
I am not a big decorations kind of person. I get overwhelmed and claustrophobic relatively easily, so adding stuff plus people plus decorations all into my home at the same time is a little too much for me. So I am here to encourage you to keep the decorations simple. As long as the space you are using is relatively clean and you have some entertainment plans, you really don’t need all the other disposable goods.
I do highly encourage balloons outside. Whether you are at your house or at a park, some balloons can really help guests navigate to your home. They will know they have the right place.
I know many of you use the baby shower as a way to announce the sex of your baby. So you may want to cover your location in pink or blue decorations. You can read about some of my reservations around gendering our children so young, but regardless of you agreeing with me or not, don’t doubt the appeal of subtle decorations as opposed to painting the entire room one color or the other with one time, throw away decorations.
The Entertainment
Baby shower games are a thing. I’m not always sure they are for everyone. Honestly, I didn’t have any games or fancy entertainment at my baby shower. If you really want to go the baby shower games route, I would highly encourage you keep it simple and optional.
You can find more suggestions for games and decorations in my Baby Shower Themes Blog.
You may want to decide if you open gifts during the shower or not. However, you may find your guests have a strong preference one way or another and thus you may want to adapt your initial decision. I personally hadn’t planned to open my gifts at the shower. It always made me feel weird to have everyone gathered around and witnessing that. But on the day of my shower, I found my guests were intentionally hanging around and waiting for me to open gifts. They really wanted me to. So I did, and let me tell you, that alone can be some entertainment.
Regardless of opening your gifts at the shower or afterwards, make sure you have someone on the side taking notes about what you got and from whom. Even if you just assign this task to someone last minute, it is very important.
After the Party
Once your party is over and your guests have left, it’s time to start cleaning up. Hopefully there won’t be an overwhelming mess for you. And a party can be exhausting, especially the further along in your pregnancy you are. Feel free to take a moment to rest, or even let your house stay a mess and get to it the next day. I hope you had a blast, and baby showers can be tiring.
Make sure you take time after your baby shower to send out ‘Thank You’ cards. I know it sounds old fashioned, but a card can mean a lot to someone. And don’t just write “for the gift”. Refer back to your list of who gave you what and be specific about what you are thanking them for. If you can throw in an anecdote about your relationship, or include why you are excited about that item specifically, all the better. Yes, your hand will hurt, but it is important to maintain your relationships and express your gratitude. If it’s helpful at all, you can split the guest list with your partner, making each of you responsible for your own people. For example, I’m going to write the card for my sister and parents, but my partner is going to write the card for his mother and brothers. This way the load is not all on one person (so often the pregnant person, I might add).
That’s it! Hopefully this was everything you needed and helps you navigate and enjoy. Remember, at the end of the day, the most important part of your baby shower is simply to celebrate your new baby. Congratulations again!
