Updated October, 2021
I’m not the first person to come up with the concept of the fourth trimester. Plenty of other women and websites talk about it. It is underplayed by the general public, or the people that at least I interact with regularly. The fourth trimester for mom is the period of time after a child is born that it takes to settle into a new routine and start recovering from pregnancy and birth.
Physical
It took your body 9 months to grow and birth your baby. Expect it to take 9 months to a year to recover those nutrients. This progress may be even slower if you are breastfeeding. I cannot stress the importance of eating well post birth to help you recover. This means diverse foods and could also mean taking supplements if needed (talk to your doctor). I personally continued taking my prenatal vitamins since I had about half a bottle left over. I also craved more milk and ate a lot of eggs after birth. It was important that I have a lot of food options and that I listened to what my body craved.
There are also the direct physical effects of giving birth. Yes, the first few days were simple recovery, staying in bed and bonding and resting. It took awhile for my lower region to really feel healed though. You need to accept that it’s going to take awhile for everything to heal up. This is true regardless of if you gave birth vaginally or via c-section. And even if it might be a strain on your relationship, sex is off the table for at least 6 weeks.
Of course, the physical changes to the body as a whole are huge. There are stretch marks, flabby thighs, and a stomach that doesn’t really seem to collapse into the shape it is supposed to be anymore. While I have opinions about getting back to the pre-pregnancy body, the reality is that you don’t have a baby and then look and feel thin again. Your stomach has to re-tone and those thighs have to be worked off again. As for the stretch marks, I have yet to find a miracle cure for those.
Mental and Emotional
Those are all just the physical aspects of the fourth trimester. The mental and emotional aspects are huge and can take a serious toll on you. Your hormones are doing some seriously crazy things as they flush out of your system and try to adjust for this post baby life.
Baby Blues are very common as your hormones try to work themselves out. You might feel sad or weepy. You might even feel a little anxious or guilty. These are normal. You want to be aware of long and pervasive sadness, which could be a sign of post-partum depression.
Overwhelm or feeling foggy is also common. You just brought a new human into the world and now you have to take care of it. This is a big step. These are all very normal feelings.
A New Life
Whether this is your first baby or your fifth baby, you have to adjust your life to accommodate the new being. Adding another person to your family is a huge step and no matter how excited you are, it takes time to settle down again.
Take time to introduce your child to their family. This includes siblings, pets, grandparents, the works. Don’t expect older siblings or sometimes even animals to be excited about this new addition right away.
Beyond others, you are going to start to adjust yourself to this new life. Your sleep schedule might change, your free time will change. These are all good changes, they are just new and different. Allow yourself time to figure out what your new life is going to look like.
Take Care of Yourself
It is important to acknowledge this fourth trimester in order to best support growing your family through it. Eat well and get your nutrition back up. Even if you are feeling tired or overwhelmed, make sure you attend your doctor appointments and take care of yourself. As you receive approval, gradually get back into a healthy exercise routine. Don’t push yourself too much, especially to start, but remember that exercise will help you feel better. Most importantly, take time for yourself. Go for a walk or luxuriate in a warm bath. I promise your little one will be okay without you for an hour and you will be able to come back refreshed and better able to meet the needs of your newborn and any other family members that you may have present.
Just know that once your baby is born, your pregnancy process isn’t over. Remember that the fourth trimester is an under-talked about thing, but a significant part of your pregnancy still.
Postpartum Support
Need help transitioning yourself and your family to this new life? A postpartum doula is great, especially during your 4th trimester. Check out my postpartum packages here.
