With the holidays upon us, I find myself reflecting once again on what type of holiday I want to provide to my children and even for my greater family. Now I’ve been told I come off as a bit of a Grinch and that I just don’t like Christmas. That isn’t true, but I do question how we as a society have chosen to celebrate it.
My parents used to start buying presents in October to stash under the Christmas tree so that we had plenty to open on that big special day. Now I’ll be honest, there are some things they got me that do stand out in my mind. Heck, I still have some of them to this day. But in my many years of Christmas, it isn’t the stuff that I remember. It’s sitting around the fire, it’s having fun with my family, it’s all the delicious food my mother cooked (of which I ate none). Our culture pushes us to focus on the gifts, but that isn’t what our children remember.
Last year, for my nephew’s gift from me, I wanted to give him the gift of my time. As a busy aunt with two young children, of course I did things with him, but rarely did I do anything just the two of us. So on Christmas day he opened 12 envelopes. Each envelope had a month written on it and a riddle. The riddle was a clue to the place we were going to go that month. There were places like the Zoo, the Butterfly Pavilion, Jump City, and rock climbing.
This method of gift giving was fun and perfect for him. First off, he was very into riddles at the time, so making 12 of them for him to figure out was perfect. The quality time was the most important part though and putting aside this one on one time for us will be something he remembers.
A promised adventure every month isn’t the only way to provide a gift that keeps on giving. Memberships for family members are a great way to provide fun experiences as well as help support them in self care. For example, there are memberships to zoos and museums for little ones. Swim lessons or the fees for a soccer team are a great regular activity you can get. Even for older individuals, getting them a membership to a recreation center or a gym they enjoy attending can also be perfect.
I truly believe experiences are what people value most in this world, even if we don’t realize it. After all, our culture trains us to be consumers of stuff. Biggest house, nicest car, coolest new toys are what we claim we value. When I was 6 months pregnant with my first child my mother in law got me a day spa package. I go a massage, a manicure, a pedicure, and a long day of pampering. I can’t remember what else I got for Christmas that year, but I definitely remember and still appreciate that gift.
My point here is not to be a Grinch or to say that everything we buy at this particular holiday is for naught. My point is that most of us could use less stuff and more fun. So maybe this year think about sprinkling the gift of time among other gifts you are buying. And if it isn’t December and you happen to be reading this, remind yourself that you don’t have to wait for a holiday to get something special for someone you love.
